Less than two hours to go until the end of 2012, and as much as I know I should go out and enjoy it with my friends, I can't do it. It's been a struggle to keep everything at bay for the past two days, and even then, I failed to keep it all in check. Right now, tears form in my eyes, impulses run rampant through my head, and normally unthinkable images flash through my imagination.
I've been told to decompress. That it would be good for me, but how can I? How can I when I hate everything around me for the most petty of reasons? When I want nothing more than to scream and rip into them for being happy when I'm incapable of that sensation?
I just want to give in. I want this struggle to be done and over with. I don't want to fight with my own mind for the rest of my life. I just want peace.
I've been told to decompress. That it would be good for me, but how can I? How can I when I hate everything around me for the most petty of reasons? When I want nothing more than to scream and rip into them for being happy when I'm incapable of that sensation?
I just want to give in. I want this struggle to be done and over with. I don't want to fight with my own mind for the rest of my life. I just want peace.
No comments:
Post a Comment